Also, this is not my usual self, but John Casey is the most awesome character ever. Damn fictional tv series....
Dear John Casey,
Please marry me.
Look, I know on paper, we’re not a good match. You’re Republican, I’m the opposite thing. You’re a trained assassin, I apologized to that creepy black spider I squished on the stairs yesterday. And then I cried a little. (I’m so sorry, creepy black spider.) Also, of course, you’re fictional.
But that’s OK. That’s just on paper. And if there’s one thing I know about the Internet, it’s that it has nothing to do with paper. I mean, yeah, there’s piles of paper nearby right now, but I’m not using any of them.
Wait, what was I even talking about?
Oh, right: why you should marry me, John Casey.
Because I respect you, John Casey. I honor you, John Casey. That’s part of wedding vows, right? Honor and respect? We’re halfway there, John Casey!
And have I mentioned that I love the way you’re always willing to pull a gun on people or tranq dart them or just plain old punch them in the face? I also love the way you growl when people do stupid things, and would like to mention that that is something we have in common. I also growl when people do stupid things, although, since I have a voice like a 12-year-old, my growl is not as ferocious as yours. But you could do the growling for me. I could just make bitch faces. We could be that couple that looks pissed off together. Wouldn’t that be cute? Omigod, John Casey, it would be so cute.
And, John Casey, while some ladies aren’t fans of the classic lines of a 1985 Crown Victoria, let me assure you wholeheartedly, that I am. Hell, John Casey, I would even help you wash your car. (Er, providing you have replaced the one that Chuck Bartowski blowed up good.)
And it would be OK, because we would be married. Married people do things like that.
Or at the least, we could date?
Let me know.
No comments:
Post a Comment